Harold's Doughnut Madness!

Happy March Madness, Columbia! 

It’s that time of year again where basketball is important for at least one month, unless of course, you are me and you picked out your bracket based on coach nicknames, mascots and teams that share a moniker with streets you grew up on. 

(I am going to lose my bracket.)

March Madness can be hard for those of us who prefer to be captivated by other sports, or maybe other hobbies in general. The only thing I know about basketball is that when in doubt, call Bill Murray. 

Bill Murray is not on my speed dial, unfortunately, but you know who is? Harold’s Doughnuts! And they are definitely adding to the March Madness fever in a way that’s better than any basketball team could ever do.

They’re hosting a doughnut bracket. It's Doughnut Madness!

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That’s right. 64 of your favorite, delectable treats will duke it out for the right to be the champion doughnut (which is better than any basketball championship in my so humble and hungry opinion).

As you can see by how I chose my basketball teams, filling out brackets can be hard. Below, I have compiled a list of doughnut stats to help you on your way to bracket greatness. How does your Doughnut Madness bracket compare?

Doughnut Overview

Classic Doughnuts

Glazed (1)

Glazed doughnuts are classic. Where would we be without the glazed doughnut? Probably nowhere. Though they lack intricacy, their simple and sweet taste never fails to deliver. They are the foundation of the doughnut empire.

Powdered Sugar Hole (16)

Powdered sugar holes are the perfect snack, and they don’t make you feel quite as bad if you eat more than one. The problem? Powdered sugar can make quite the mess. If you’re okay with looking like you got more doughnut on your shirt than in your mouth, than go PSH. 

Jam-Filled (8)

Know what’s better than biting into a doughnut? Biting into a doughnut and finding a jelly surprise. Jam-filled doughnuts are the mullets of the dessert world: business on the outside, party on the inside.

Cinnamon & Sugar (9) 

Sweet and spicy, the cinnamon & sugar doughnut offers a combination of the best flavors that will overwhelm your taste buds in the best way. Your hands might end up sticky, but your stomach will be happy. 

Sprinkles (5)

You can never go wrong with sprinkles. The homemade treats add a pop of color and a little bit of flare. Your mouth might be blue by the end, but it’s worth it. 

Glazed Doughnut Hole (12)

The little brother of the glazed doughnut, it has all the benefits, but lacks the size. Be careful. You might overcompensate for what you’re missing. 

Apple Fritter (4)

Sources say the apple fritter is the Bentley of doughnuts. The apple fritter is classy, delicious and always worth the extra penny. 

M&M Topped (13)

M&Ms are great. They’re like sprinkles, but better because they’re colorful and they have chocolate in them. They add texture to your doughnut in the best way. 

Blueberry Cake (6)

Blueberries are great and cake is great and blueberry cake is great and blueberry cake doughnuts are of another world. This combination is a blessing, if you can handle it.

Chocolate Long John (11)

The chocolate long john is a classic. It’s the perfect shape for milk-dunking and it’s got the perfect frosting to doughnut ratio. It’d be hard to pass this one up. 

Boston Crème (3)

Here’s a true (biased) fact: BOSTON CREMES ARE THE BEST DOUGHNUT OF ALL TIME. End of story. 

Strawberry Cake (14)

We’re here with the cake-doughnut-fruit combo again and it’s a battle of fruits now. Which will you pick? 

Chocolate Frosted Cake (7)

It’s like a birthday party on a doughnut. What could be better? 

Powdered Sugar (10)

Like the doughnut hole, powdered sugar is delicious. But can you handle the beard you’ll get after? 

Old Fashioned Bar (2)

Another classic, the old fashioned bar has everything a long john has to offer, but with a sweet glaze instead. This doughnut is the perfect combination of shape and taste.

Maple Bar (15)

The maple bar adds a little something special to the plate. The maple flavor enhances the typical glaze. It pushes the boundaries of sweetness, so be careful. 

Crazy Doughnuts 

Harold’s Doughscuit (1)

Do I even need to explain this one? The Doughscuit is something you never even knew you needed. 

Goat cheese Elderberry (16) 

Feeling adventurous? Give this unique combo a try. Even if Monty Python is the only place you’ve ever heard of elderberries. 

Fried Chicken & Doughnut (8)

Let’s face it. Fried chicken is the new collaborator dish. Put it on everything. 

Grilled Cheese Doughnut (9)

If fried chicken goes well with a lot of foods, cheese goes well with everything. You can literally never go wrong with anything cheese related. 

Sparky’s Harold’s Hot Doughnut Sundae (5)

What’s better than Harold’s? Harold’s working with Sparky’s. Put ice cream and doughnuts together and that’s where the magic happens. 

Cinnamon Toast (12) 

Cereal isn’t the only food that can capture this great flavor. Pick this donut to enjoy all the plusses of this great tasting donut minus the milky mess and the soggy cinnamon.

Booche’s Burger Harold’s Doughnut (4)

Booche’s burgers are a staple in this town. Why not eat them at every moment possible? 

Mimosa Doughnut (13)

Nothing says good morning like a mimosa. Nothing says great morning like a doughnut. And nothing says best morning ever like both at the same time. 

Café Berlin Harold’s Bizmarcheese (6)

Bismarcks are delicious to begin with, and that’s without the cheese. With the help of Café Berlin, this doughnut goes the extra mile.  

Pizzanut (11)

PIZZA DOUGHNUT. That’s all. 

 Como Boss Taco Harold’s Taconut (3)

Tacos, like doughnuts, are versatile and delicious. Put them together and they can be unstoppable. 

Arnold Palmer (14) 

Arnie Palmie alert! Arnie Palmie Alert! Why pay a dollar for an Arnie Palmie when you can just get it in your doughnut instead. This doughnut is summer out of the can and in the dough. 

Wafflenut (7) 

Leslie Knope would be proud. Can’t choose what to have for breakfast? Smash them together and eat them both. Together, they can satisfy any morning craving. 

French Toast (10)

Why so many breakfast doughnuts? Breakfast is inarguable the best meal (duh.) The soft, sweet taste of French toast will make this doughnut something you need every morning. 

Harold’s Cronut (2)

New York isn’t the only place you can get cronuts! That’s right. Harold’s has perfected the fluffy croissant/doughnut combination and it is not something you want to pass up. 

Mojito Doughnut (15) 

The refreshing minty taste of a Mojito is the perfect thing on a sunny spring day. Especially if you can have it in your glass and on your plate. 

Craft Doughnuts

White Chocolate Red Velvet (1)

The white chocolate red velvet is the perfect in every way possible. The combination of flavors makes for a perfect doughnut that is inexplicably delicious. It is otherworldly. A gift from the heavens in dessert form. 

Bourbon Glazed Cake (16)

Baking with bourbon is hobby that more of us should take part in. Though the alcohol might be a little strong for some of us, it makes the perfect counterpart for a glazed cake doughnut. 

Turtle Long John (8)

They say you shouldn’t try to change something that’s already great, but adding a little turtle to the long john was a genius move. You can’t go wrong with a little caramel and crunch. 

Cherry Streusel (9)

The cherry streusel doughnut is the perfect dessert combination of textures and tastes. It’s a pretty basic dessert in a new and exciting form. 

The Elvis Doughnut (5)

The King would be going out of his mind if he saw his favorite treat in doughnut form. PB & banana are the perfect mouth-watering combination and will leave you taste buds all shook up. 

PB&J (12)

The best lunch ever just got better. Do you need an excuse to eat more PB&Js than you already do on your college budget? Put it on a doughnut and call it a day. 

Blueberry Lemon Citrus (4)

One of the more sophisticated doughnuts of the bunch, the blueberry lemon citrus is perfect for a day at the country club (probably). A refreshing snack, this doughnut will quench your fruity thirst. 

Salted Caramel (13)

A carnival in your mouth, the salted caramel doughnut is a sweet treat just like the taffy apples you eat on the Ferris wheel at the fair. It’s a fall day without the leaves and rain. 

Orange Dreamsicle (6) 

This doughnut is your childhood. Enjoy this doughnut without having to wash your hands after. 

Peach Split (11)

This doughnut tastes like southern charm and hospitality. The peach is an underrated fruit and definitely deserves a second look. 

Strawberry Split (3)

Like the peach split, but sweet in a different way. Let your taste buds duke it out for which fruit it best. 

German Chocolate Cake (14)

A heartier cake doughnut, the German chocolate cake is rich with flavor and will leave you begging for a glass of milk. Can you handle the chocolate overload? 

Oreo Peanut Butter (7)

Two wrongs don’t make a right, but two rights make a really good doughnut. These two favorite foods combined help create the doughnut of your dreams. 

Black Forest Cake (10)

Unlike the cold cut you know so well, this doughnut sounds a little more mysterious. Do you pick your bracket based on names? This is probably the way to go. 

Maple Bacon (2)

Bacon is one of the most important foods on this planet. Pair it with maple and literally nothing else matters. 

Cherry Fritter (15)

Second cousin to the apple fritter, the cherry fritter is a little less popular but still has a lot to offer. Just give it a chance. 

Creative Doughnuts

The Faurotnut (1) 

You know what tastes great with doughnuts? School spirit. Help lead your tigers to victory by taking one for the team and indulging in the best doughnut ever. 

Dark Chocolate glazed (16)

The health benefits of dark chocolate are unprecedented. Eat doughnuts and be healthy at the same time. It’s a dream come true. 

Samoa Doughnut (8)

If you don’t like Girl Scout cookies, you’ve probably never eaten one. Samoas have it all in terms of cookies and are even better put on a doughnut. 

White Boa Coconut (9)

If you could squish a pina colada into a doughnut, it would probably be this. If you like getting caught in the rain and you’re not into yoga, this is probably for you. 

Strawberry Milkshake (5)

This doughnut will bring all the boys (and everyone else) to the yard because it’s delicious. Eat this doughnut and don’t worry about it getting stuck in your straw. 

Key Lime Pie (12)

The zestiest of the group, the key lime pie will keep your taste buds alive and alert through the whole meal. This doughnut is tasty, but with a kick. 

Como Smoke & Fire Brisket Kolache (4)

There is no limit to what you can do with dessert and the Smoke & Fire Brisket Kolache proves just that. Whoever said you can’t have doughnuts for dinner is officially wrong thanks to this savory sweet. 

Green Tea (13)

The most Zen of the doughnuts in the bracket, the green tea will relax your taste buds and your mind. It might even be good for your health. 

Pumpkin Spice Cake (6)

You can almost hear the sound of Uggs being ripped back out of their dark spots in the closets of girls everywhere. That’s right! You can get something pumpkin spice related without it being fall! Take advantage of this. 

Fruit Loop Doughnut (11)

Kill two birds with one stone by dunking this treat in milk. That way, you get your morning breakfast and the dessert after (because every breakfast should be followed by dessert anyways.)

Fretboard Coffee Harold’s Mocha (3)

Another collaboration doughnut, Fretboard supplied their delicious blend for our mocha-flavored treat. This coffee doughnut will wake up your taste buds for sure. 

Cranberry Orange (14)

Florida in a doughnut, probably. This doughnut tastes like sunshine and happiness (and also tangy citrus).

Harold’s S’mores (7) 

All the tastiness of a s’more without the hassle or the mess! Bonus: you also won’t smell like fire for 5 days. 

Chocolate Chipotle (10)

What’s better than Chipotle. Not much, if we’re being quite frank. But if you add some chocolate and slap it on a doughnut, it makes a fair fight. Two great things on one dessert. What could go wrong?

Jalapeno Cheddar Sausage Kolache (2)

Not your average pastry ingredients, this Kolache spices things up a bit. If you’re looking for something outside the dessert box, you’ve come to the right place. 

Cookies ‘n cream cake (15) 

Who wouldn’t want Oreos on anything, tbh? Oreo-flavored anything is a gift to mankind. Don’t overrate them.

And with that, we have the complete analysis of the Harold’s Doughnuts bracket. Take your picks and see if you can make it to the championship! I’ll be taking the Boston Crème all the way to the finish, but tell us about which one you’re picking for the winner and why!